If the Lord is my Shepherd, I hope he doesn't punch me in the jaw.

Don't You?

This is a reaction to "Out Like a Lamb" a short story.
I actually read this before in one of my core English classes, and I didn't like it for some reason. Some reason that is completely past me because I loved it this time.
To throw "some stars out" on a five star scale I'd give it a three and a half. I like it when I read it to myself, but we read it outloud in class today and the complete change in tone, the way it was read, made me interpret it completely differently.
The fact that the author was a Catholic also altered my view of it. That changes the whole thing. (This is an appreciative shout out to my Eng300 class last spring, stories are always more enjoyable if you have a relation or common ground with whoever is behind it).
So he's a Catholic who said, "...Christ called us his flock, his sheep; there were pictures of him holding a lamb in his arms. His face was tender and loving, and I grew up with a sense of those feelings, of being a source of them: we were sweet and loveable sheep. But after a few weeks in that New Hampshire house, I saw that Christ's analogy meant something entirely different. We were stupid helpless brutes, and without constant watching we would foolishly destroy ourselves."
This sets such a good tone. He analyzes waaay too much, to the point where the bias that this creates towards sheep influences his religious belief. Also the way he paints himself up as a cowboy, a failed cowboy at that.
A cowboy who is good at what he does would not accidentally kill a sheep by shooting it in the ass.
It's such a contrast to me. Cowboy writers. Tough guys who harbor an inner poet. Not to say that this story is incredibly poetic, but the act of writing well is an art.
I'm ranting.
I'll stop.

Suffering from insomnia, so I'll react to Lamott and be productive.

So the last bit of Bird by Bird blew me away. Lamott went from being witty and funny to really introspective and enlightening. One thing that I liked about this book was the variation in her writing. She's a very strong writer no matter what mood she's trying to take on, and I respect that.
Some excerpts I underlined:

P192: "...maybe this is the only way we ever really have anyone- there is still something to be said for painting portraits of the people we have loved, for trying to express those moments that seem so inexpressibly beautiful, the ones that change us and deepen us."

p913: I liked her reaction to the editor who said she made 'the mistake of thinking that everything that has happened to you is interesting'. In reaction to the editor: he's made the mistake of thinking that his opinion means much. I think that pretty much everything that she has said is interesting. Minus her long excerpts on getting published, because that's not my main goal in life. Although I'm sure that those sections would be of interest to aspiring authors.

p914: (sorry, she was on a role in this part I guess) Where she talks about how since she was writing for people who she loves, she was really careful and soulful with her writing, making sure not to be overly self-indulgent, and because of her selflessness in her writing, it was her best. You have to respect that. Although it's different for everyone. It might not work like that. Some people just write to get what they were keeping in, out. Not just for other people. I think it would be more of a challenge to write about someone else's experience, because it's so seperate from you.
For instance, I think it's an incredible challenge to write a good biography, and I commemorate those who do. I remember reading John Adams by Dave McCullough for my AP History class in highschool, and although large portions of it were amazing, I have a very vivid recollection pulling a little engine that could it was so hard to get through.

On the next pg. (195) she talks about writing in her own voice. And how it's natural to take on the voices of the authors you admire before you find your own voice. And then after you get into your own you write in honor of them. I couldn't help but get self concious at that part....I hope I write in my own voice. I'm going to list my influences real quick and someone can react and call me out on it if I'm too much like any of these writers. I mean, obviously there will be influence, but I dont want to be overbearing.
1. Oscar Wilde
2. Dave Eggers
3. Milan Kundera
4. Jack Kerouac
5. Rainer Maria Rilke
6. Pablo Neruda

Ok now I look at that list and I chuckle at myself.
There's no way I could compare to ANY of their genius.

P196: her use of the word "fantastical" is...fantastical.
....
is that even a word??

Now, page 200 really got to me.
Because it directly hits on my theme for the rest of the semester. Home.
"God is your home," and I pass othis on mostly because all of the interesting characters I've ever worked with-including myself- have had at their center a feeling of otherness, of homesickness. And it's wonderful to watch someone finally open that forbidden door that has kept him or her away. What gets exposed is not people's baseness but their humanity. It turns out that the truth, or reality, is our home."
There. Right there. She nailed it for me. That's my goal for this semester.

I woke up at 4:30 this morning to make muffins for muncie and this is the result.

lots and lots of it.

One Liners

Newg saves money on pomade by only washing his hair every three to four days. It's true. He just told me.
One could also assume that this also saves him money on shampoo.
Every year I collect one liners that my teachers say in classes, and write them all down to laugh at later. I have a pretty good collection going. Honestly you would not believe what some professors say. Don't worry I'm not citing anyone. Taken out of context some of these could completely be mis-interpreted, and I like all of these professors.
So here are some:

"It's alot easier to believe in God when you have guns"
"If you don't want the gorilla to get through the wall, then don't put a gorilla sized door on the wall."
"stay away from dialect...unless you're Mark Twain."
Newg improved on this: Yes I agree, sometimes even when you're Mark Twain.
"If only the government knew how I used my grant money."
"Hey, Let go of my tennis shoes."
"I really don't understand why college students don't watch teletubbies when they are high."
"How do you spell E.T?"

In other news.
I try to do a random act of kindness every day. On lazy days I just hold open the door for people.
Today was a lazy day.
I was on my way into the RB building for lit class and proceeded to hold open the door for two young men who were approaching. And then two more young men came, and then three, and two more...and pretty much I found myself stuck there for a solid two or three minutes holding open the door for people. I felt like a lawn jockey. As illustrated. I was stranded there. Newg's friend Amanda came by and gave me a pity face followed by a "oh honey."
Luckily I counted, and I'm counting my good deed for the rest of the week because I literally held open the door for thirty people.

In other news, this week I get to cross off three more things off of my imposing list of things to do before I die, so now I only have 95 more life goals. Tomorrow I have a 1.professional photoshoot and a 2.magazine interview for the school's weekly installation of 72 hours. Today I had my first 3. harp lesson. And I really took a liking to it. I can't wait to practice tomorrow. Luckily for me I already have calluses from piano-ing and barista-ing, so my hands are pretty much made for it.
I've never been so excited to play scales before.

I'm procrastinating by writing this so I'm going to get back to work.